Nerd Life

Cause if you’re not really here, then I don’t want to be either

“Black and Gold” by Sam Sparro is owning my soul today. I heard it on Pandora on the way to work and was instantly hooked. Damn you, Pandora. Damn you.

It’s really quite humorous how people will react towards the idea of sabotage. I’m not talking about the actual act of sabotage, just the idea of it. The possibility of someone stepping into our personally determined territory and changing the flow of life concerns us to such a degree that we’re willing to do whatever it takes to take them down, even though not a single act had been committed. It’s something we are all guilty of, yet it takes us so long to realize what we’re even doing. The work place is the number one area that I’ve seen such irrationality take over a person’s focus and turn them into an evil beast of a human towards others. I must sadly admit that I am just as guilty of this crime as the next person. My hope is that someone somewhere is reading this, having a moment of clarity, and joining me in this struggle to see and live beyond this feeling.

In an era where so many are easily replaceable by someone who strives to give yes answers and can work for a cheaper rate, I think we allow this notion of toe-stepping to overrun our minds and make us stray from what’s really important: what we, as individuals, are doing. Our focus should be on the day at hand, not the penciled schedule of our neighbors. I think this thought has also hindered the work ethics of so many people my age and younger. The mentality that if they’re doing, then I can, too. It doesn’t matter what they’re doing! What are you doing? Are you being the best you can be? Are you busting your hump to show that you’re worth keeping around? Probably not. I know I wasn’t. The same train of thinking can be paired up with our personal lives. Am I being the best friend I can be? Am I making myself emotionally available to my significant other? Am I making time for my family? Am I making time for myself? We get so caught up in the daily grind that it gets harder and harder for us to cut the ties that bind us and think clearly enough to make sound decisions.

As these feels invoke paranoia and anger it also kills our morale, because how can you feel like you’re worth something in the eyes of another when you can’t see the worth in yourself? When we hit slow patches in our long-term relationships, our minds make us think that our significant other has lost interest in us and gained it another. Do we ever stop to think about how maybe it just means that not every day we spend with the person has to be exciting? Sometimes, quiet time just means quiet time. If our friends being to form new friendships and work towards blossoming them, we feel compelled to force alone time with them. What if that new friend is in dire need of someone to listen to them? Now we’ve hurt two people while trying to stop the invisible hurt in ourselves. If a co-worker is assigned a job task on a project you’re working, it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re taking over, just that they’re trying to help.

Life is one long classroom session with very little recess breaks. We must learn from our mistakes and grow from them, while doing our part to teach those around us. That is how a better, happier, healthier environment is created. Next time you’re in a situation like this, please remember to pass a smile, not a rumor.