I’ve been having this overwhelming urge to run away from my life lately. This deep-seeded need to sell everything I own and pack my bags and just go. I have a few ideas where, but it’s not important. It’s like my system just no longer has the drive to live the life I have and would much rather apply the effort to living a life that I’m actually happy with. I sort of just fell into this life that I’m living right now. Since my grandmother’s passing… it just feels like the bullshit around me isn’t worth putting up with anymore. I care so drastically less that everyone around me is convinced I hate them to some degree. That’s not it at all. As much as I would love to blame this on the medication I’ve recently started, this has been building for quite some time now.
I’ve been working on a post for the past month of things I want to have done by the time I turn 30. I postponed a lot of it when I realized I would be turning 30 in 3 years and made the cut-off year at 35. That’s fucking bullshit to me. A good chunk of those things are already accomplished, why I couldn’t I do it all in the next 3-4 years? I’m young, I’m not married, and I don’t have demon spawn holding me back. Now that Grandma has passed away, there’s very little holding me back from doing the things in life I
want need to do. You gotta do you, boo. Right?